Allie Catter and the Prisoner of Lulzkaban
Cast of Characters:
Allie Catter, the grrl who partook of the Apple and lived.
Sirius Dork, the Prisoner of Lulzkaban.
The Sherrif of Grippodam, Guerrilla of the Vinyl Solution.
Alien Johnslam, mild-mannered Dorkplace employee by day, intrepid crime-stopper by night
Lark Donnybook, mild-mannered Dorkplace employee by day, imaginative book-maker by night
Lol Eater, the inevitable highly attractive bait.
Professor Moultonagall, narrator of improbable stories.
Our highly improbable story takes place at Boggart's School of Lulzsec and Bigotry.
Backstory: Alien Johnslam launches a secret program of Radical Profiling in the Town of Least Pallid Auto, which eventually becomes a career-ending scandal for her. But before that banal denouement, there is Dramahz Galore as Sirius Dork (a misguided resident of Least Pallid Auto) becomes ensnared in a dangerous game of Guerrilla Theater, inspired by the Sherrif of Grippodam's original Guerrilla Theater of the Absurd, known to Trolls everywhere as ED's Sully Van Theater, an Evil Cult of the Vinyl Solution, where nobody gets out alive.
Our story begins as Allie Catter is drawn into Boggart's School of Lulzsec and Bigotry by Lol Eater, the Dreaded Demon of Dopamine Drives, where the name of the game is Narcissistic Hounding. Allie Catter meets Sirius Dork at the Boggart's School and engages him in a lop-sided battle of wits, skits, and snits. Their ill-conceived affair devolves into a Tragic Story of Unrequited Hate.
Sirius Dork blunders badly, and is arrested by Alien Johnslam on a suspicion of being a dork in public. Lark Donnybook charges the miscreant with Dorkplace Violence for Over-Acting in the Guerrilla Theater of the Absurd. Bail is set at 100,000 Knuts, and Dork is sent to Lulzkaban, where he tattoos the Dork Symbol on his ribs, all the while brooding over his fate and planning his revenge.
We take up our story just as Sirius Dork escapes from Lulzkaban and resumes Dorking in Public on the mean streets of Least Pallid Auto.
--To be continued--